Cloudy October

*Just finished my board exam. I'm not happy about it. Almost half of the Materials subject I guessed. Not a very clever thing to do. I messed up with my full-scale drawing. Just because of that 1 effin missing inch I screwed up. Right now I have a heavy heart. If it weren't for Mama and Papa plus all the expecting eyes on me, failure will be bearable. I don't want to disappoint them. I just hope the results won't come. Maybe a big fire can destroy our exam papers so we can do it all again. I'm dreading next week. I don't want it near. My heart, I can't hear my breathing.

*No matter how frustrated I was after the exams, I was genuinely happy. I was able to catch up with two of my favorite people. Still it can't mask this sinking feeling. Happiness is just a phase. It'll pass any time soon.

*This coming Monday I'll have to wear a corporate attire --read: corporate-- I don't know what that means but I have to. It's for my job application. It's long overdue, It's about time. Though I don't really like the job description, I'll give it a shot.

*I used to think I don't like people telling me 'Good luck'. For one, simple reason -- I don't have it. Not a minute bottle of luck I was able to catch. But right now, at this very moment until I don't know when, I need all the luck I can get. The board was over. There's nothing I can do now but wait and wish for lady luck to side me this time. Not that I believe I can be lucky, I can still try to hope.

*I'm in rock bottom now. Anyone up there who can give me a hand?

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