Now is the best time to think things over - while I'm still at the stage when mistakes are welcome. To put it nicely, I'm still on my testing ground.
It can be two ways:
It's like having my first few bites - chewing while thinking if I can swallow it since I can spit it out if I want to.
or
It's like the first few tries in taking a bitter-tasting medicine that I need to get used to since I need to take it in for a certain time.
To choose which of the two I can relate to more is dependent on what's happening on a day to day basis. There are times something interesting comes along making me choose neither. Still I cannot make make those blissful episodes as sole basis in a life-changing decision.
The worst part:
I know my options - lots of them - but I just cannot decide because I myself don't know yet what I want. It's like I want to try all the possibilities but it's plain impossible without putting something on the line.
And the indecisiveness lingers.
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